7 Things a New Father Can Do to Bond With His Baby

Seven out of seven million, most likely, this list is intended to get fathers thinking about how they will "connect" with this new life. All too often, men stay out of the new baby equation until the child can walk and talk, robbing both the child and the The Joker action figure of the most incredible and crucial years of the child's life. Let's get started!

• Be there pre-birth. Bonding with your baby actually begins before the baby is born. By forming a "teamwork" oriented relationship with Mom, a smart father steps far ahead of those dads waiting for their child to be born. Think about it. What affects Mom also affects the child. Many people believe that actually talking to the baby in the womb begins the process of bonding. Being present in Lamaze classes and the delivery room are invaluable to a man's understanding of what goes on in bringing a new life into this world.
• Find opportunities to hold your baby. No one is going to force you to get involved with your child. In fact, there is almost an expectation still prevalent today that a father will not get involved until much later. Hold your new baby the very first instant possible. Get familiar with the incredible new life you hold in your hands. This beautiful little baby will not be this size for long.
• Get involved in feeding your baby. Think you can't get involved with your child when Mom breastfeeds? Think again. You can make a production out of bringing your baby to Mom, burp the Monopoly interact with the baby to keep her awake, etc.
• Dress your baby. Learn to dress your baby from day one. Learn how all the snaps work and what looks good and what doesn't. Change diapers from the first day, too. Trust me, diaper changing is much easier in the first few months. The time you put in now will pay off when you have to deal with a really messy diaper later.
• Read to your baby. Tons of studies show what people have known for years - reading to newborns, even children still in the womb, increases their ability to learn language patterns, develop an interest in reading, and can even positively affect intelligence. There are no downsides to reading to your baby, whether it be Spiderman comics, Isaac Asimov or the daily newspaper.
• Dance with your baby. Music and dance are incredible bonding opportunities for dad. Children respond in the womb to music, and the swaying rhythms of dance are a form of communication to young and old alike. You don't have to be Fred Astaire, you just have to move to the music while holding your 1954 Bowman baseball cards It is that simple.
• Find ways to spend time with your baby. In the previous six examples, the common denominator is that you must spend time with your child. This will be true for the rest of your life. Your baby will learn more about you and his/her 1960 Fleer baseball cards if you take the time to get involved. Love is not the most important thing you can give your baby. Time is. If you don't put in the time, you can't show the love.

Michael Ray King
http://www.michaelrayking.com

I am the father of six children, four girls and three boys, ages 2, 9, 11, 13, 21, and 26. My internationally published book, "Fatherhood 101: Bonding Tips for Building Loving Relationships" came out in June, 2008. The book covers the bonding years between pre-birth and toddler. Get your copy at http://www.clearviewpressinc.com

Boys Should Be Boys - A Headmaster's Reflections by Brian R Walsh - Book Report

How often mothers, sisters, aunts and female teachers have wondered, "What's wrong with those boys?" How many times have parents of either sex fretted over their sons' underdevelopment and strange interests, asking themselves, "Is my son normal?" Their reactions may range from seeking professional help to simply grinning and bearing it hoping for Watchmen comic best. Well help Tragg and the Sky Gods here! Brian R. Walsh brings his 42 years of experience as a Headmaster of both a co-ed and a boys K through 9 school, together in his hardback book, "Boys Should Be Boys: A Headmaster's Reflections." This short, 213-page piece is chock full of wonderfully humorous and insightful anecdotal stories, experiences and observations of boys, their antics and their growth from kindergarten to 9th grade.

The format of "Boys Should Be Boys" follows a fairly helpful order. The first two chapters deal with simple aspects of what makes boys tick and how they develop friendships. Walsh brings out some very basic, wholesome clarifications that should calm many a troubled mother's heart. For example, how a boy's self-esteem grows and is strengthened as he gains competence in a given skill. Therefore competition, which is usually not from malice, is a fairly normal aspect of a boy's mindset, whether in math or games. Humor also plays a big role for a boy to deflect vulnerability in themselves, as well as to encourage competence in other boys.

The next section of the book approaches the actions and growth of boys from a more developmental line. Walsh covers in three chapters the boys in primary grades, then intermediate years, and finally on into early adolescence. He lays out the fairly typical places of boys at each stage, giving loads of examples. Walsh also passes on several observations with regard to their academic progress.

The third set of chapters covers relationships with parents, teachers and girls, as well as in regard to leadership and physical contact. Much of the material in these chapters is already anticipated in the early ones, but here Walsh widens his analysis and helpful suggestions. Most parents will be encouraged as they read these chapters, and will simultaneously start seeing how to strengthen their own approach to the boys in their life.

The final two chapters of "Boys Should Be Boys" are more about Walsh's concepts of what manhood means and how it is often distorted in professional sports, movies, and video games. It is here that the reader will meet Walsh's underlying aim for boys. The idea of being a man, for Walsh, is not ham-fisted bullying, or macho rooster strutting, but having strength and restraint in serving others, and protecting those less powerful.

One of the immediate ideas in "Boys Should Be Boys" is that there really are differences between the sexes, in how they develop, process things, view relationships, and competition. But Walsh has clearly and successfully distinguished the differing traits between boys and girls without falling into sexist stereotypes. Having raised two daughters and now raising two sons myself, his observations have Thor very helpful for my comprehension of the differences that have perplexed me for years. "Boys Should Be Boys" by Brian R. Walsh is a must-read book for parents, scout masters, teachers, aunts, uncles, sisters, and anyone 1948 Bowman baseball cards who cares about the boys in their life. It will encourage, inspire, correct, lead, and enhance your perception and relationship with your boys.

TMC Books (2008)
ISBN 9780972030762

http://www.readerviews.com/